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1. Make your
product or service the hero. Have it save someone’s life.
2. Go cosmic. Have your product loom in the sky like a UFO.
3. Create a fantasy spokesperson like the MAYTAG guy, the unhappy
repairman or MADGE, the manicurist for Palmolive Soap.
4. Use a phony celebrity, doctor or other authority figure, like
a woman in a lab coat saying “who would know they’d work
so well in the operating room?”.
5. Use a real celebrity. It doesn’t have to cost much if you’re
local, use a local celebrity.
6. Establish a charity that fits your size and stature and performs
some useful, popular function, like sending kids to camp..
7. Back kids. (Baseball team, etc.)
8. Use babies or pets doin’ their thing,
9. Use babies or pets as if they were adults, puppies, flowers.
10. Unique selling proposition. USP. The ONLY car that flies.
11. Turn it upside down. Hard to ignore a car on its roof but if
you make pumps, have a contest to see if people can TELL if it’s
upside-down.
12. Go inside. Take a trip through your product, using an endoscope.
It’s truly amazing.
13. Stay away from sexual innuendo. It offends too many people.
Instead, use romance. Show couples on cruises who find out they’re
both in your industry. First meeting between strangers happened
over your office copier, etc.
14. Blow it up. Backwards, so it comes together.
15. Use research. “80% of doctors recommend…”
16. Use phony research. “80% of bugs think RAID violates their
civil rights.”
17. Have a treasure hunt. Plant clues around the city and people
will write in the kind of fun they had for a prize.
18. Use a cartoon character, like Tony the Tiger, or the toucan
for Fruit Loops.
19. Establish a unique position. “Fastest-growing, smallest
company in the business. The one across from IBM.
20. Price it in Russian rubles, Brazilian Cruzeros, or some other
ludicrous monetary system. “Buy it today for only 12,346,672.50
rubles!” (Eight dollars)
21. Tie it to a huge phony event. “The offical supplier to
the Alpha-Centauri expedition.” “Space cowboys drink WOW!”
22. Use an alien spokesperson. “When we first came to Earth,
we thought THIS was the dominant species because…”
23. Send your product on a date with a beautiful woman. Dining,
dancing, and how it felt to be treated with respect.
24. Forced, random and improbable connection. Use a viking cowboy
or a cookie doctor, or snooze chemistry.
25. Have your wife complain about all the time you spend at work,
perfecting your product (or service). “Is he NUTS? People don’t
expect perfection! Why does he try to give it to them?”
26. Use a different
point-of-view. A bird’s-eye, or insect’s or dog’s
or little kid’s.
27. Pick a dinosaur. Nobody’s using them as humourous corporate
symbols, except the Toronto Raptors. “ More room inside than
in an appatosaurus.” “We had a brontosaurus step on
our toilet seat and…”
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28. Use a charlatan.
Have a psychic make a prediction, a shaman compare, a medium hold
a seance.
30. Invent a game, like footmall, where women crush each other to
get to your product. Everybody knows you’re just havin’
fun, son!
31. Take a mental trip. Liken your product to something you find,
like a butte in Montana, or the staue of liberty in NY, or a bayou
in Mississippi.
32. Make science work for you. Demonstrate. Burn it, show it underwater,
on the salt flats, project it on the moon, reveal its chemical composition,
the physics involved.
33. Have a bunch of old movie stars “roast” you, or demonstrate
you, or accompany you to a luncheon (look-alikes)
34. Invent a “good-housekeeping seal of approval” or an
award that you won, or start an annual industry bash using your
name.
35. Use ludicrous testimonials. “The Jivaros of the Brazilian
rain-forest make shoes out of our tires that last longer than anything
else they’ve ever tried.”
36. Use REAL testimonials!
37. Continue on in the tradition of…pirates, robber barons,
outlaws, heroes, SUPERheroes. “It took us a while, but you’ll
find we finally overcame the legacy left to us from great, great,
great, great Uncle Bart the Upstart, whose attempt to unseat the
British monarchy, suggested the idea for SMAM, the meat of power
lunches.”
38. Use the “secret of…”
39. 27 reasons or ways to…
40. Freeze-dried and vacuum-packed. What a concept! Use it for you,
as in power-stitched, hammer-sealed, helium-blown, wind-cured, sea-tested,
babbling-brook water. You create one, it becomes an unique selling
proposition!
41. McDonald’s added $300,000,000 to their bottom line by asking:“will
you have fries with that?” How can you sell up or promote your
product? “With every pail of our nails, keep the pail.”
42. Leave something out. “What’s missing from this picture?
43. Put something in. “Note the red knob.” (Remember pink
fibreglas? Who makes it? Blue shipping containers from…? What
name is on the side?
44. Tell a story. “fifty thousand years ago, the key ingredient
in our framis began it’s long journey to Cincinnati. Along
the way, it changed the way you eat bagles.”
45. Use relatives. “Quick! Hide the (your product) If they
see it, we won’t get rid of them for months!”
46. Use relativity. “Finally, something faster than the speed
of light. The brilliant shine on ZEAL.” You don’t have
to negotiate with dead guys.
47. Show the truth in a new way. “No matter how hard we tried,
the ugly truth kept surfacing. Our competition is just not….”
48. Twist the familiar. “Think SMALL.” “A stitch
in time saved the bottom line.” “Rock and ROAD!”
49. Use your president. While you would think they’re the LEAST
credible people to talk about your products, people still respect
authority. Especially if the person is appealing.
50. Use “the little guy”. “I started as a shipper,
and I noticed that… They say my suggestion saved the account.
Hey, it’s all part of the job.
The booklet has the rest. PLUS more detail on how to use these.
Go to the order page.
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