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Need to negotiate
a deal? A car? A home? A relationship?
Negotiation
can be fun. And the beauty of it is, almost no one negotiates properly!
(You could say that this gives you a competitive advantage!) It’s
a skill which needs knowledge and practice. It can make the difference.
The principles are free. If you want more depth, you can order the
whole booklet on the order page.
1. The first thing to remember is that everything under the sun
is owned or controlled by someone else,and if you want them to part
with it, you have to come up with something THEY PERCEIVE is valuable.
Different people want different things and money is not always important.
2. Do your homework,
studying the people involved, what they have bought or acquired
in the past, and with whom they ally themselves. Study what they
have, how they got it, and with whom they negotiated. This is due
diligence, and if you do it, you will immediately propel yourself
into the player’s world.
3. Only deal with the person who can say yes. You don’t want
lawyers trying to interpret what YOU want. And be prepared to walk
out at any moment.
4. There are three critical issues going into any negotiation. Power,
time and information. Your homework tells you what kinds of power
your adversary is willing to use. You MUST have all the time in
the world. And the one with the most information has an edge.
5. Power types include REWARD power. If you use this, their instinct
is to go for more and more. Only if your reward is UNIQUE to THEIR
deepest desires will you succeed, at a price you can afford.
REFERRENT power is the power of association. If your adversary is
a team builder, this can be valuable. The trouble with it is, most
people on the team end up trailing their hands in the water, while
YOU do most of the paddling. The people on YOUR team can lend you
enormous influence. Choose them carefully, and only trust them when
they have DONE something to help you.
OWNERSHIP is a key power, and it’s often not clear who has
the title. Be sure you find this out, and the current value it carries
on the market. If you have something they want, build up intangible
value to beef up the worth. Read Elly Goldrat’s masterful business
novels on this.
EXPERT power can be useful if you know something they don’t,
or you have intellectual property they want. Never let them SEE
you use your expert power. Once you use it in front of them, you
lose it. I once worked for a guy who hired an assistant for me.
THe assistant dutiifully observed me every minute for six months
and learned all I had to teach, at which point, I was fired and
the assistant was promoted to my job at half the salary.
CHARISMATIC power is something you have or you don’t. If you
walk into a room and everybody stops what they’re doing to
look at you, you have it. Read Robert J. Ringer on “Winning
Through Intimidation” for a romp on this.
TIME can be a power if they’re short of it, and you’re
not, and you must NEVER be short of it! (As far as they know.).
INFORMATION is a power if you know something they don’t, or
you demonstrate a sound understanding of what’s at stake.
COERCION power. What countries do when they run out of diplomacy.
Force. Intimidation. Blackmail. Hostile.
According to Herb Cohen, a master negotiator: “If you believe
you have power, you have it!”
6. Determine which kinds of power are prevalent in the situation
as soon as possible, and prepare countermeasures. For instance,
their money can be balanced by your expertise or information.
7. Repeat statements as questions, ask for clarifications and for
them to state it in another way. Ask questions so that they have
to THINK about their answers. For instance, “I think I understand
your position. Have you considered how THIS will affect your position?”
“What would be a reasonable exchange to ensure my cooperation?”
“If I offered this, how would it help you?”
8. It’s VITAL that you understand PERSONALITY STYLES. Is the
other person a lion, a bear, a fox, or an otter? A driver, a plodder,
a schemer, or a an amiable. A right brain, left brain, visual, aural
or kinesthetic? Study all these various ways of looking at people
if you REALLY want to be a player. Probably the single most important
skill you can acquire.
9. Look to sudden changes in BODY LANGUAGE for clues to your adversary’s
state-of-mind.
10. So-called gambits abound. Most negotiators know them, and your
use of them will earn respect, but move on. Some, however, work,
even though they know they’re being used. For instance, always
FLINCH when they offer something. “Whew. Are you sure? That’
WAY too much! Let’s go over the components again. I must have
missed something!” . HIGHER AUTHORITY: “OK, I think we
understand each other. Now I just have to present your offer to
my board of advisors. Other than that, I feel good about this!”
SET ASIDE. “That seems to be a sticking point. Let’s agree
there’s room for discussion there, and set it aside until we
are further along.” THE NIBBLE. Once you’ve agreed: “Oh
by the way. It’s pretty much standard to include this in a
deal like this. Can we include it?” GOOD COP/BAD COP. You seem
eager to please, while your colleague acts the hard-nosed skeptic.
3-F’s: I understand how you would FEEL that way, I’ve
FELT like that on similar occasions, but what I FOUND was this.
Does this compare with your experience?” BANANA PEEL: “Oh,
I thought we had agreement on that point. I’m afraid we’ll
have to scrap what we’ve said so far, if that isn’t taken
care of.” Many of these abound, and I’ve covered most
of the ones there are in the booklet. They’re too numerous
to list them all here.
11. Dramatise any concession you make, and make sure you get a counter-concession
that you reluctantly agree to.
12. YOU write the contract. ALWAYS. Then get YOUR lawyer to check
it. THEN present it to them.
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